Friday, November 09, 2007

Asda Man And The Perils Of Aisle 13


She has always been a bit over familiar that one. You may remember
last time, when she tried to sneak me her mobile number. I am afraid to report that now she has gone too far. I have seldom seen a compliment go so to a girls head in such a foolhardy fashion. Why really, I barely went beyond a polite thank you.
I mean she was kind enough to point out that the fine ale that I was sneaking past the baleful glare of the security guard (I am blessed with nsuch youthful looks...) was on a ‘two for one offer’. Very kind indeed. But lord help us, she then went on to point out that I would now have enough to share with a friend.
The hussy.
I gave her a stern look that Paddinton's Peruvian aunt Lucy would have gazed upon with the female equivalent of avuncular affection. Practically inviting herself up to my mountain for some drunken orgy like that. Even assuming that such a thing ever happened. Ahem.
After ticking her off soundly, I gave her name tag in at the customer service desk I can tell you. And a piece of my mind to the lady who was obviously looking after the seat while the proper manager was away being important. On reflection I wish he had been there, things would then have been settled in a prompt and positive manner. You see the kind of thing that can happen when men turn their backs.
Anyway, here we are a few days later and they have sent me a letter. Not a word of apology mind you, nor any kind of reassurance that the minx has been summarily dismissed. Oh no.
In fact I am not sure that I like the letters tone at all, there are quite a few words in it that I am having to look up but the whole thing has note of what I believe is acronised to BDSM. Most odd for a superstore, even in this day and age. Phrases like ‘personal restraint’ and ‘self discipline’ spring off the page …..
Lord knows what I am going to do if she catches my eye next week.
Harumph!

9 comments:

headless chicken said...

Ahem???
The brazen hussy obviously wants you badly!!! I steer clear of supermarkets.....not because I have been stalked or propositioned by any strange men though. I just don't like shopping trolleys....or queues....or the other shoppers....

Vi said...

hehe, I love it how men can be so dillusional! ;P

buffalodick said...

My day is filled with that sort of thing- at least I think it is.....

Anonymous said...

unbeliveable! I know how you feel.. I get the same from young 23 yr old boys in my work place...ahem

Unknown said...

F*ck her,I say!!

Ronnie Rowlands said...

Your link to this page on your Livejournal account summed up Halloween pretty well, I think.

Bittersweet said...

you need a body guard, for sure.

sallywrites said...

????!!!!!

meredic said...

headless chicken - Town centres have a similar effect on me. I can manage A supermarket, for some reason I seem to be able to step into a different persona there...I find myself becoming Redvers Potter.

vi vi vi vooom!!!!!!!! - dillusional....I don't understand....

bufalodickdy - the fact that you might not be sure shows that it probably is

anonymous - no , this was definately a girl.

john.g. - sir! Please...Decorum

Ronnie - pick on someone your own age.

bittersweet me - a grown up to look after me when I stray ouitside you mean....

sally - I guess with such a large family you tackle the supermarket with a little more precision than me then?