Friday, November 16, 2007

And Found


Once the Royal Automobile Club had determined that I hadn’t actually had a breakdown and wasn’t in danger on the side of a motorway they declined to rush to my assistance beyond putting me in touch with a locksmith.
“£270 pounds call out , can be there by nine p.m. sir.”
Politely declining his generous offer I tried another approach. The local Ford garage.
Again a very nice man.
“Well on that model it’s an electronically chipped key so we will have to tow it in, break in to the car and get the serial number. Unfortunately we don’t keep any record linked to the numberplate on a database. Its going to be around £370 pounds sir.”
“No that’s alright sir, you use any expletive that you like. I am sure I would in your position”
The whole of the carefully squirreled Hallett Christmas fund was slipping away before my minds eye. After the events earlier in the day this was not so much adding insult to injury as turning the knife and kicking me when I already felt down. Perhaps the great Moo Moo really had deserted me and I was truly alone in an unforgiving universe.
Clutching at a desperate straw I reasoned that I would be quite prepared to work hard for three or four hundred pounds. So I trudged to the big shop. Taking care to avoid aisle 13 I bought a torch for £5 and a second one just in case that one ran out a bit quick.
Trudging (hmm I like that word) back to the pitch black beach I found a suitable stick. I dragged the stick and made a line from the dunes to the tide. Walked a couple of metres to the side and sweeping the torch back and forwards trudged (it was sandy what can I say) back between the tram tracks. A small pool of light in acres of darkness.
And I continued thus for several hours.
Reports of UFOs and ships lost at sea for the night must abound by now, and I expect there will be a write up in The Weekly Witter. I went through various levels of weeping frustration and hysteria. I dragged my stick and swept the torch back and forth. I offered a prayer to St Jude ( the great Moo Moo is seldom offended).
Eventually, unbelievable even now, I found them!
I found a small bunch of keys on a beach a mile long and half a mile wide in the dark!!
Tonight I am buying two lottery tickets, the numbers I shall be using are……..

9 comments:

Vi vi vi vooom!!!!!!!! said...

Now THAT is extrememely lucky!!!! That's a ridiculous amount for a locksmith to charge!

Anonymous said...

Well done! Two torches? Had you been brave enough to tackle aisle 13 you would have been told where to find batteries. Maybe you are at that stage in life where you need to attach you keys to your belt......if you have a belt that is!

buffalodickdy said...

Around here,we are big fans of extra sets of keys....

sablonneuse said...

Oh I am imagining you going up and down that beach for lonely hours until the exultation of finding them. I'm worn out thinking about it . . . . .

Sparkle Plenty said...

Glad you found them--against all odds! I'm always misplacing my keys and imagining the worst (e.g., I threw them away by accident, I left them in the locked car, they have been spirited away by pixies and/or Borrowers). Good on you! Have a great weekend!

DaveM said...

Amazing, whats the odds on this happening. So...........what are you going to do now in case it happens again!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Mike said...

I am conscious of the fact that with my Focus, you can easily lock the keys in the car. It works like this. Return to car with shopping, open tailgate, load shopping into car, close tailgate, try to open driver's door ........ still locked. Now where are those keys ....... some idiot put them down in the back of the car next to the shopping! Unlocking the tailgate does not unlock the central locking on the other doors, and the tailgate locks itself every time you close it. I've only done this once, and fortunately Jo was with me, and she had the spare key in her handbag.

Best regards to you all.

Mike

bittersweet me said...

What a relief. Well done.

I shall be paranoid now, with my single car key. Although i always have a small crisis when i park next to a drain grid, just in case.

meredic said...

vi vi vi voom!!!!!!!! - I thought it was a lot as well. In fact it had me wondering just how hard being a locksmith could be!

anonymous - hmm yes a belt would help with the saggy arsed trousers as well I suppose....

buffalodickdy - I know I know. Trouble is these Ford keys cost a fortune to clone,especially if you only have one of them for some reason.

sablonneuse - you know it really did lighten the day again when I saw them there.

Sparkle Plenty - locking the keys in the car really is a cruel accident isn't it.

davem - Given the strategy that I folowed I think the tide was the only thing against me in the end. As for the future. I am trying to find someone who will make a copy of a chipped key for less that £100 at present. Its either that or leave the car open all the time.

mike - nice to see you. Unfortunately when I bought the car second hand there was no second key.

bittersweet me - get a second key. It is the accident that is bound to happen eventually.