Friday, June 27, 2008

Dastardly Deeds

If forced to hit the nail on the head I would say that Mel next doors owl has blabbed…but lets take a step or two back.

“Its OK he’s off the scene!”
As an opening gambit from a woman I find this always raises the Hallett eyebrow a notch. It slightly more than hints at the promise of an interesting diversion.
“I think I must have managed to poison him.”
But by now I am just checking over my shoulder in case. Maybe this is too much revealed at such an early stage in our relationship, for I swear I don’t recall ever having met the woman before. Unless she asked me to move my car or something like that. But we certainly don’t have the relationship that I feel is implied.
“You haven’t a clue what I am talking about have you?”
At last I am given scope for a reply.
“I am afraid you do have me at a loss.” I confess.
“Its just that I heard that you had a gun.”
I thought we were turning back to a slightly more normal tack I am suddenly in the woods again.
“I put it in a note but your son hasn’t given it to you yet.”
Chains of evidence and consequences are running riot. Not last the threat to my position in the Guild.
As she walked away I began to wonder what on earth I had inadvertently let myself in for.

Later I read the note.

Dear Mervyn.
I hope I have got the right name. I have a very troublesome pigeon – I hear you may be able to help me get rid of it. Will you be kind enough to ring me?

It appears that the bird had been dining out on her seedlings but eventually fell foul of slug pellets.

Sunday, June 22, 2008

Hair Of The Dog

Asbo is keen to polish his image. As a bit of a hound about town he, like so many, is conscious of the up and coming opportunities to show off dogly physique on the beach.
Like me he is figuring that there are a limited number of days until his summer holiday and the weight loss figures are in fact now stretching along a spectrum ranging through possible, to optimistic, and thence in sight of cloud cuckoo land. I inhabit the latter end of this spectrum and tend to rely on deep breaths and leaning forward slightly as part of my regime.
Asbo however has struck on a novel and possibly unique solution. He has come up with a winning formula that should not only have him in the trim, but may also render him cool for the beach in others ways as well.
His singular take on summer weight loss is to shed hair.
I was cleaning the sitting room at Hallett’s Mountain this very afternoon and can attest to the fact that he is already several pounds lighter.
To give him a further helping paw, and indeed I shall now be constructing his own personal outdoor wooden gymnasium in order that he can maintain his new svelteness.

As you can see he is also busy preparing for Wimbledon.
New balls please!

Saturday, June 21, 2008

Good Evening, Good Morning

Sunset 20/06/2008

Sunrise 21/06/2008

Photos of a sunset and a sunrise can be flickred from the little gadget slightly lower down the page to the right.
This post is really aimed at the people that were there. I hope you like the pictures and feel free to grab any you would like for yourself. If, for some reason, you would like a larger version than the ones shown here then drop me a line. Facebook finds me quite easily.

To anyone else out there.
Have a belting solstice....

Monday, June 16, 2008

As Midsummer Approaches


I wrote this a few years ago, 2001 I think. And then I lost it….

“I saw the sunrise on midsummers day!!

Well what a glorious morning it was yesterday.
I awoke ( having thus lain) upon a bed of heather and bilberry. High above Penmaenmawr and close by my favorite druids circle. My watch confirms that the hour is 03.40 and at this longitude the sun will rise in about an hour. Already it is light enough to read by. The cup from my flask beside me can now be used for coffee. Last nights whisky seems to have gone the way of all whisky. I shall also chew on one of these chocolate bars. An unusual breakfast.
Some of the other people around have lit a fire and the smoke from the dying embers gives the air a nice tang.
There are five other people inside the circle. Irfon and two from the North of England are finishing off cider and sweet cigarettes. Lain close round the fires remnant they talk with morning murmurs, occasionally laughing loud. A long haired druid from Rachub and his ladyfriend are sheltering under cloaks and stone.
So I sit and await the sunrise with them.
For the first time in twenty years the cloud is broken and Irfon announces the prospect of a fine day ahead. For the next half hour the gods confound him by shuffling the grey bits more evenly and after a while I notice that the whisky has retired him to his tent.
The sky grows lighter and the spread of pink dawn glow becomes more concentrate in an obvious center. The cloud moves back from the sea again and miles away, Oh high above the faint line of the Penines the light grows steady and stronger.
Skylarks have been awake for some time now.
Am I the only one left awake?
Looking around now I can see several people moving. Early morning visitors. Ones who were unable to keep the watch, or too comfortable in their beds last night, are approaching.
Five , maybe six more are coming up the slope to the druids circle. One dark haired girl attracts my eye for longer than the others and I have a fleeting glimpse of our future.
Then like a light turned on its there, a sudden golden splash seen across a hundred miles. Lighting the sky with its aching beauty and for a second stilling us all. The far away hills turn to fire. And as I have waited so long for this my heart soars with the skylarks.
Sarah, wake up, hey John. Good grief Irfon was up all night and now he’s passed out in his tent!
Photographs , as many as I can take.
Then afterwards I look at the dark haired girl again, dream another dream, and go home to a well earned bacon sandwich.”

I am not sure what to think of it now.
A few secretly smiled that they were the dark haired girl.
Including She Of The Town House.

If you click the picture you can find a larger version should you wish. It is the view from my house on the day before midsummers morning (1999 I think).

Saturday, June 07, 2008

Pond Life

I spent a little of the afternoon photographing dragonflies over at the pond today. This creature had just emerged, crawling out of the skin of it nymph form, and was drying its wings out in the sunshine.

Wednesday, June 04, 2008

Testing Times

It’s the end of the Key Stage in the workplace. Now if that makes no sense to you then believe me you are probably better off.
Teachers all over the country are busy turning persons in to numbers and reporting them onwards to people who will grind statistical mills, reducing data to provide the next terms seasoning of information.
Many of us feel very dubious about the process but it’s the law and we have to do it. We are only following orders.
In pursuit of this end today one of my classes was completing a test provided over the internet by a company revelling in the name of
After a briefer than usual period of retrieving passwords and retyping links my class is settled and engaged by the chirpy little fellow dancing around options a, b, or c. Flash animations are used to pretend that this is something more than a multiple tick test and is in fact interesting. Not many of us are fooled.
As this is the fifth time in a week that I have sat through the earnest clicking of thirty mice I begin to daydream.Thinking back to a rather good party on the weekend. Mulling over the prospects for tea. Trying to……
The all too familiar sound of every key on the board being assaulted is followed by a wail. Someone isn’t pleased.
I always find that understatement is best so look over the top of the glasses. I raise my best Roger Moore eyebrow in question.
“ They haven’t given enough time to answer the questions! I keep getting zero!!” Close to weeping tears of frustration.
I am not sure that it is possible to be full of mild concern but I still think that the muted response will cause the least escalation.
“Let me check your machine a moment, it should be giving you a minute to read each question and answer it”
The student next to the one in question holds his head in his hands and closes his eyes. Several others rock with mirth.
I had to turn away.

In other news. She Of The Townhouse still hasn’t noticed my new glasses. Oh well, at least she hasn’t sat on them.