Friday, June 27, 2008

Dastardly Deeds

If forced to hit the nail on the head I would say that Mel next doors owl has blabbed…but lets take a step or two back.

“Its OK he’s off the scene!”
As an opening gambit from a woman I find this always raises the Hallett eyebrow a notch. It slightly more than hints at the promise of an interesting diversion.
“I think I must have managed to poison him.”
But by now I am just checking over my shoulder in case. Maybe this is too much revealed at such an early stage in our relationship, for I swear I don’t recall ever having met the woman before. Unless she asked me to move my car or something like that. But we certainly don’t have the relationship that I feel is implied.
“You haven’t a clue what I am talking about have you?”
At last I am given scope for a reply.
“I am afraid you do have me at a loss.” I confess.
“Its just that I heard that you had a gun.”
I thought we were turning back to a slightly more normal tack I am suddenly in the woods again.
“I put it in a note but your son hasn’t given it to you yet.”
Chains of evidence and consequences are running riot. Not last the threat to my position in the Guild.
As she walked away I began to wonder what on earth I had inadvertently let myself in for.

Later I read the note.

Dear Mervyn.
I hope I have got the right name. I have a very troublesome pigeon – I hear you may be able to help me get rid of it. Will you be kind enough to ring me?

It appears that the bird had been dining out on her seedlings but eventually fell foul of slug pellets.


Trixie said...

LOL! That would have confused the hell out of me too!

bittersweet said...

mervyn? *snigger*

a little tin foil tied to string is also effective.

startare said...

In this part of the world, it is the magpies that have proliferated and turned into a real menace. The gun is a tempting option, even though someone said they are a protected species, though I can't think why.

Mike said...

..........what a way to find out you had a son! Must have been quite a shock.

In a similar vein, we have just had to find a nursing home for my elderly aunt, and now I am told she is in fact my mother!

Still looking forward to August.


Mike said...

.....perhaps I should have left out the "in fact".........


Sally Lomax said...

Definitely not a Mervyn! I've put this really cool new thing on my blog btw..... I have a snippet of all your blogs, so can see the new ones!